Happy Endings

I hit the sack with drunken eyes 
calming the melancholy of a tired soul
A passive repine stripping everything apart 
vanquished by the pensiveness of the intoxicated night 

The chime of nocturne playing around
taking away all the woes the night has bound 
I loose consciousness, drowning in subliminal 
Dreams so real, reality feels like an intermission 

Wandering into a vivid world 
where all creators swayed and twirled 
Sweet yet infringiing thoughts leaving me bewildered
the only place where happy endings are believeable 

Then I see you, ever so beautiful 
I go back in time to change the ending 
but anxiety tickles up my body 
and sweet dreams get butchered by sad memories 

Feels like yesterday when your hands wheedled my wounds 
Now all I can see are the scars 
Spending time with you felt like spring in october 
Now that you're gone, I'm rarely ever sober

Your thoughts choke me until I'm blue
Denied feelings have paralysed my mind
I wish just once
I could live a happy ending

Dawn arrives and sunrays flutter my eyes open
I go back to pretending; supressing all my thoughts 
Burying them in the deepest holes in my heart 
accepting that anguish and lamentations are life's ways

Trying to master the blistering pain, soaking into sorrows
leaning onto walls, no matter how hollow 
living among those sinking smiles and solitary
trying not to get caught cause
Happy endings are just an illusive mind's persvasive thoughts...